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~*~ the here and now. ~*~ the done and gone. ~*~ who am i? ~*~ find more like me ~*~
say something to me. ~*~ what they've said about me. ~*~ feel left out? ~*~ get pretty. ~*~

stockholm syndrome?
2006-03-29, 12:02 a.m.

current mood: getting tired. it's a good sign.

current song: stockholm syndrome by muse. coincidently, my favourite song on the album. download it. it rules.

i won't stand in your way
let your hatred grow
and she'll scream
and she'll shout
and she'll pray
and she had a name
yeah she had a name

and i won't hold you back
let your anger rise
and we'll fly
and we'll fall
and we'll burn
no one will recall
no one will recall

this is the last time i'll abandon you
and this is
the last time i'll forget you
i wish i could

look to the stars
let hope burn in your eyes
and we'll love
and we'll hope
and we'll die
all to no avail
all to no avail

this is the last time i'll abandon you
and this is
the last time i'll forget you
i wish i could

i'm just idling time, i suppose - letting myself get sleepy, so i can go to bed, and then get up in the morning and be a productive member of society. i've got half a mind to call off tomorrow, since i think that eric is going to take the day off; it being his birthday and all. but if he doesn't call off and i do, then i would feel really bad, i suppose. i've got $10 that he's not coming in tomorrow. and that will suck, because they'll put me with someone who sucks and can't lift and i'll throw my back out and yes; my cookie will hurt big time. and i will call people and whine all day, just to hear the sound of my own voice.

so yeah, no. things aren't getting any better on the so-called "home" front. he's being a cock ass, and i'm ignoring it all, being a good girl. the more shit i put up with, the better my karma gets, and i could use the boost. fortunately, he can't read my mind, or i'd be in a whole mess of trouble - yes, the idea of that boy is still running around in there, wreaking havoc. but at this point, i have 3 options:
1) pick up my painkiller habit again;
2) begin to drink heavily; or
3) retreat into la-la-land, where everything is pretty and i have a husband who doesn't treat me like shit.

i'm liking 3 the most of all of those, as i do not strive to be my mother. besides, i'm out of pain pills, and i don't feel like running to the liquor store.

well, kids, i'm off to bed for the night. i can pretend that it'll all be better in the morning.

~*~ immediate yesterday. ~*~ divination. ~*~

~*~ entries from 2002 ~*~ entries from 2003 ~*~ entries from 2004 ~*~ entries from 2005 ~*~ entries from 2006 ~*~ entries from 2007 ~*~ entries from 2008 ~*~ entries from 2009 ~*~


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