|
i hope you're happy with what you've done. current song: sleep to dream by fiona apple. i tell you how i feel but you don't care i say tell me the truth but you don't dare you say love is a hell and you cannot bear and i say give me mine back and then go there for all i care i got my feet on the ground and i don't go to sleep to dream you got your head in the clouds and you're not at all what you seem this mind this body and this voice cannot be stifled by your deviant ways so don't forget what i told you don't come around i got my own hell to raise i have never been so insulted in all my life i could swallow the seas to wash down all this pride first you run like a fool just to be at my side and now you run like a fool but you just run to hide and i can't abide i got my feet on the ground and i don't go to sleep to dream you got your head in the clouds and you're not at all what you seem this mind this body and this voice cannot be stifled by your deviant ways so don't forget what i told you don't come around i got my own hell to raise don't make it a big deal don't be so sensitive we're not playing a game anymore you don't have to be so defensive don't you plead me your case don't bother to explain don't even show me your face cause it's a crying shame just go back to the rock from under whence you came take the sorrow you gave and all the stakes you claimed and don't forget the blame i got my feet on the ground and i don't go to sleep to dream you got your head in the clouds and you're not at all what you seem this mind this body and this voice cannot be stifled by your deviant ways so don't forget what i told you don't come around i got my own hell to raise because if it meant nothing than you would have had no problem showing it to us. and if it meant nothing, you would have fucking just told us who it was from. and none of this would have happened, and we could have played "happy family" for just a little bit longer. although, this was a long time coming. i told you that i washed my hands of you a long time ago. and i fucking meant it. i should have never come back. i should have never let you worm your greasy stubby little fingers back into my life. god, laurie, you had me so fooled - your poor husband, my loving father - your other children...we loved you. and we were willing to support you through carol's death, and your depression, and anything else that came about. we would have followed you to the ends of the earth. i certainly would have. god, you had me convinced that you gave a damn; that you needed someone to lean on and that person was me. and i was willing to do it. and you hurt me. again. this is nothing like all the times you hit me because you were angry about something stupid and little. this is nothing like all the names that you have called me. this is nothing like all the lies you were convinced that i had told, even though 90% of the time i was telling the god damn truth, seriously. this is nothing like all the money that you blatently stole from me, or the credit cards you had in my name that ruined my credit. this is nothing like all the plans i made with you, and you ditching out on me at the last moment. and this is nothing like you force-feeding me who you wanted me to be for all of my life, and all but abandoning me when i could not be that. no. this is far, far worse. because you haven't just hurt me. i will bounce back - i will overcome. just like every other time. this time, you hurt my little sisters, and my little brother. but worse than that, you broke my father's heart. the man who loved you madly, who would have done anything for you. the man who worked himself half to death to afford you anything you could have ever wanted, and more. and now, over a stupid text message to some man who doesn't mean a fucking thing to this family, you have obliterated any thing you had here. you have single-handedly destroyed your own life, and the life of my father, and the lives of your children. i used to feel sorry for you. and then, i became very angry. and now? and now i could give a shit less about you - a taste of your own medicine. if you had poured half as much of yourself into your own family, instead of: 1.) trying to fucking impress everyone with them, or; 2.) expending all your energy into other peoples' lives; none of this would have happened. so, fuck you, laurie. ~*~ immediate yesterday. ~*~ divination. ~*~ get your own guestbook here |
