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~*~ the here and now. ~*~ the done and gone. ~*~ who am i? ~*~ find more like me ~*~
say something to me. ~*~ what they've said about me. ~*~ feel left out? ~*~ get pretty. ~*~

too sad to cry.
2002-12-05, 10:46 p.m.

it's over

you don't need to tell me

i hope you're with someone who makes you feel safe in your sleep

being tonight

i won't kill myself trying to stay in your life

i've got no distance left to run.

when you see me


turn your back and walk away

i don't want to see you 'cause i know the dreams that you keep

that's where we meet

when you're coming down think of me

i've got no distance left to run.

it's over

i knew it would end this way

i hope youre with someone who makes you feel that this life

is a life

one that settles down

stays around

spends more time with you

i've got no distance left to run

i'm coming home

so cold


~blur - no distance left to run~

i've been working mornings the last week in "training"; i say training in quotes like that because monday i swept the floor for 5 1/2 hours, and tuesday i was apparently too good to sweep the floor, and i got to mop for the most of my shift. it wasn't until wednesday and today that i did actual work. so my schedule is completely messed up, and my body thinks it should be sleeping when i'm at work so i'm having major difficulties. oh well.

by the way, i'm sorry. i don't know if you still read this, i don't think you do, but i'm still going to write to you. i just think it would be best if we didn't talk anymore. i guess. whatever.

you hate me and everything i like and i can't do anything right around you. i never could. as good of friends as we were, i couldn't date you. it killed me every day, because i was hurting you every day. i'm not stable, i'm not right, i'm not clean and pure, and i couldn't be what you need. maybe one day i'll be able to talk to you directly again, but i don't know. this is all so strange and so fast...

maybe one day you can forgive me for all this. maybe. until then, i'm infinately sorry. you have no idea.

maybe you compared me to kristen so much because i am just like her, as much as neither of us wanted to believe it. i like rock music and ska and punk and all those things you hate, i cut my hair short and colour it because i like it that way. i know too much and i don't know when to keep my mouth shut, and i hurt your feelings constantly without meaning it. i eat things for texture, and listen to music for the words. i find meaning in things you disregard.

i'm sorry.

~*~ immediate yesterday. ~*~ divination. ~*~

~*~ entries from 2002 ~*~ entries from 2003 ~*~ entries from 2004 ~*~ entries from 2005 ~*~ entries from 2006 ~*~ entries from 2007 ~*~ entries from 2008 ~*~ entries from 2009 ~*~

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